thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish

Contact 4 credit: Emailio.Addresstevez@gmail You can't get an STD if you never get tested.
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e15/c140.0.360.360/18721814_781848501992463_8230089295499624448_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


@Malibu_rum brought me to South Africa to run on a beach in slow motion, because hot girls and dudes with sick bodies is sooooo out. YEAH @ZACEFRON I'M TALKING TO YOU AND YOUR WEIRD 12-PACK OF ABS. epicslowmo becausesummer Snapcode: malbu.us/snap

1 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/18644847_262458030894472_3791778213319933952_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


I would run my tongue over Steve Buscemi's teeth for a frittata right now.

1 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e15/18580320_288060271604374_583029552595337216_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


This video of Katy Perry is whiter than Mike Pence snowboarding into a TED talk that's happening inside a Coldplay concert that's happening inside a farmers market while drinking a saffron flavored craft beer and being offended about something while wearing cargo shorts that were autographed by Jon Stewart at a live Daily Show taping and the pockets are filled with locally sourced conflict-free burrata ( @versace_tamagotchi)

5 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/18644787_1037068213104818_4052968235585241088_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


Either that or be a tiny bead of sweat running down Sofia Vergara's butt crack and into her majestic fart box during a Bikram yoga class.

7 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/18513941_1942392559377971_7717656734528962560_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


Mural of me in Australia by talented hunk @lushsux. Even at that size my dick is smaller than Scottie Pippen's. He supposedly has the biggest flesh burrito of all time. @webroughtwine

8 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/18579944_291006024685048_3913414118094143488_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


@delta please explain this and also the guy sitting next to me right now is watching Austin Powers: Goldmember and LAUGHING OUT LOUD and that should definitely not be allowed on a plane because first of all he's in public and secondly that movie is about as funny as a fire at an orphanage

8 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/18444858_294768400949242_8188777650051874816_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


Another weird thing adults do: HAVE FUCKING CHILDREN ON PURPOSE ( @marissamiller__ )

9 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/c0.117.937.937/18512335_2105231686370169_881724569319112704_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


ROSÉ SEASON IS UPON US. Go to www.swishbev.com and buy that pink in either a bottle or a can (yes, it comes with the long straw) and embrace your inner basic bitch. Everything is 20% off SO DO IT NOW, DON’T BLOW THIS PLZ.

10 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/18514265_130863910807444_8851759178503421952_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


No, that fedora will not make you look like Don Draper. It will make you look like a colossal douche canoe.

10 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/18514273_1920030068266242_7366839686918045696_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


It's like really really really shitty "Ocean's 11"

10 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e15/c236.0.607.607/18444491_417019102011748_787151382326018048_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


Why do @JoeJonas and @DNCE have a new song called "Kissing Strangers"? Is it possibly because on my radio show he and @DillonFrancis, who were strangers, played spin the bottle and ended up touching tongue tips? NOT NO.

11 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/18513548_123815071516651_6001629193094299648_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


*GOLF CLAP* WELL PLAYED SIR!

12 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/18382194_1334098139970556_4652389002584784896_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


Also, stop posting photos of your mom looking hot and fertile back in the day! It's fucking creepy!

13 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/c0.62.857.857/18512637_1872048733044066_769491846899433472_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


SHOUTOUT TO TARA GRODT FOR MY FIRST HANDJOB, IT WAS DRY AND LEFT MY PENIS RED AND GLOWING LIKE E.T.'s FINGER BUT YOUR HEART WAS REALLY IN IT GIRL

14 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/18298744_815557221925429_5350491865890160640_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


Happy Cinco De Mayo to anyone who voted for Donald Trump but is wearing a sombrero and a fake mustache today and chugging tequila you are literally fucking MENTAL

22 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/18253085_1768383426808246_9078625179348762624_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


Nobody is probably gayer than a guy who hates gay stuff.

23 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/c0.53.844.844/18251508_410755585961948_8539591661120913408_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


Speaking of sandwiches, I bet Liam Neeson has a footlong made of flesh in his pants.

24 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/18160928_198402284004120_1250506477286719488_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


Here's a hint: they regularly buy things at a hand-churned butter shop in Williamsburg. Wait, that doesn't fucking help.

27 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/18160415_824977530993380_5921216362952261632_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


The only place I ever lived in that's smaller than my current Manhattan apartment was inside my dad's balls. ( @black_humorist)

27 Days ago
thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s280x280/e35/c0.135.1080.1080/18162142_426120574419714_1095268968886697984_n.jpg

Comment from thefatjewish:


I just joined @badoo, here's how you make a dating profile that will get you results. Rescuing puppies! Sushi! No STD's!

27 Days ago